


Encore

by yooodles



Series: Extended Play [3]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Lawyer Jaehyun, M/M, Post-Break Up, Songwriter Doyoung
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2020-05-18 20:27:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19342012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yooodles/pseuds/yooodles
Summary: It was supposed to be easy and straightforward; another day, another case. Jaehyun definitely wasn't supposed to come face to face with the man he loved and left five years ago.





	1. Loved and Lost

**Author's Note:**

> Encore has begun. Thank you to everyone who has made it this far.  
> If you haven't already, I'd advise reading [Cocoon](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18752392/chapters/44484556) and [Red](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19088284/chapters/45349270) first as they go over the history of Doyoung and Jaehyun's relationship.  
> I hope you enjoy.

Jaehyun checks the time again and sighs as he steps into the large building. The day had barely started and it was already starting off on the wrong foot. He’s never late, he even always makes it a point to be early, in fact, but traffic and luck were not on his side today. He’s at the headquarters of some record label,  _ SM Records _ , he notes from the giant logo plastered on the front and above the reception desk. The bored looking receptionist gives him directions, and Jaehyun quickly rushes to catch the elevator.

It was his first meeting with a new client, an un-debuted artist named  _ Lee Taeyong _ , and from his file, it seems like a run-of-mill assault case. It’s very straightforward, plenty of witnesses and security camera footage; any entry-level lawyer could probably handle it no problem. Jaehyun usually prefers handling more complex cases and he’s built quite a reputation for himself over the last couple of years.

It’s wasn’t uncommon for people with power and money to take notice of his reputation and hire him to take on simple cases. He personally thought it was a bit of a waste of money and the clients were usually jerks, but at the end of the day, he was getting paid and if anything, these no-brainer cases served as a bit of a break. 

He follows the receptionist's instructions to the 16th floor, which according to her was where all the music production studios were. Odd place to meet with a lawyer, but he wasn’t in any place to judge. A short-looking man with black hair and piercing eyes greets him as soon as he exits the elevator. He greets himself as  _ Ten _ and Jaehyun doesn’t miss the way he gives Jaehyun’s entire body a once-over with his eyes with a smirk. He doesn’t think too much about it, he’s used to people checking him out, especially when he was dressed in a full-suit like he is now.

“You’re late,” Ten points out, but his voice is teasing, “Mr. Kim won’t be happy about that.”

“I thought my client was Mr. Lee,” he asks politely, wondering if he had misread the file or something.

Ten laughs, “It is, but Mr. Kim is the one paying your ridiculous fee so it would be in your best interest to keep him happy.”

Jaehyun mentally grimaces, this  _ Mr. Kim _ person already sounded like he was going to be a pain in his ass. Ten leads him down the hallway towards what looks like a large recording studio and lounge. Ten puts a hand out to stop him when he tries to enter, his expression turning serious. There are two men seated across from each other, who appear to be in a deep conversation. From his angle in the doorway, he can clearly see the face of one of the men. His face is littered with little bruises and a large bandage covers the majority of his right cheek. He’s got quite a handsome face, underneath all his injuries, the kind that would probably turn heads. Perfect for the kind of profession he’s in. He assumes this must be  _ Lee Taeyong _ , and the man sitting across from him, with his back currently turned to him must be Mr. Kim.

Ten holds up a finger to signal to Jaehyun to wait, probably for them to finish the conversation, and Jaehyun just nods in reply.

“I’m fine,” he hears Taeyong whine as the other man,  _ Mr. Kim _ , appears to be fussing all over him, checking the bruises on his face, “you didn’t have to fly all the way back for this or hire some crazy expensive lawyer for me. I could have handled it myself.”

It appears to be a personal conversation and Jaehyun is just about to step further away from the doorway to stop listening when a voice catches him off guard.

“I leave the country for one week and this happens,”  _ Mr. Kim  _ says, “I shouldn’t have gone.”

Jaehyun freezes on the spot and feels his heart rate begin to pick up. His legs feel weak as he hears the voice sound in his ears and his head starts to spin. It’s a voice he knows all too well, one he’s listened to for more than half his life, and one he hasn’t heard in over five years. That couldn’t be right, there was no way it could actually be  _ him _ , but the name lined up and upon closer inspection, the back of that head was starting to look more and more familiar. 

“You know it’s not your fault,” Taeyong says gently, reaching a hand to cup the other man’s cheek, this was turning into a more intimate exchange than he had first thought.

The other man,  _ Doyoung _ , sighs and places his own hand over the one on his cheek, “I just wish I could have been there for you when it happened.”

Taeyong gives him a small smile, “All that matters is that you’re here for me now. Got me some fancy lawyer too.”

“Speaking of which,” Doyoung says, voice starting to grow irritated, “Where is he? I sent Ten to fetch him over 20 minutes ago.”

As if on cue, they both turn their heads to the doorway and Jaehyun doesn’t even have to think before he’s looking straight at the face of the man he loved and left five years ago. It’s like the breath has been knocked completely out of his chest and from the widened eyes and slack-mouthed expression on Doyoung’s face, he wasn’t handling it much better. 

Jaehyun doesn’t move, he feels like he can’t move, at least not until he feels Ten nudge him in the side.

“Come on,” he says, half pushing him into the room, “I think we can get started now.”

Jaehyun nods dumbly, but enters the studio and takes a seat next to Taeyong on the couch as he takes in Doyoung. He looks older yet the same, and just as beautiful as Jaehyun remembers. He curses at himself for thinking that. His hair is styled back with gel and he’s dressed in a pair of fitted black slacks and a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up. It’s an odd visual to take in, for all the years he’d known Doyoung, he doesn’t remember ever seeing him in anything that needed ironing. Jaehyun isn’t sure if it suits him, or at least it wouldn’t have suited the Doyoung he knew, which he doubted was the same man that sat before him.

Doyoung is the first to recover from his shock. He gives his head a little shake as if to clear it, eyes hardening and mouth clamping shut into a thin frown only a second after Jaehyun sits down. He looks away quickly and crosses his arms over his chest. It takes a moment for Jaehyun to realize he’s been openly staring and he tries to school his expression as quickly as possible. Regardless of  _ whatever _ this was that he was going through right now, he was a professional. Jaehyun wasn’t going to let personal feelings get in the way of his job.

He belatedly notices a hand being stuck out towards him, one that was attached to Taeyong and Jaehyun quickly goes to shake it, hoping he hasn’t left him hanging for too long.

“I’m Taeyong,” he greets brightly with a smile, “Thank you for taking on my case. I just wanted this over as soon as possible.”

“Jung Jaehyun,” he greets back and out of the corner of his eyes he swears he sees Doyoung flinch slightly in his seat, “I’m happy to help. From the information I have in my file, it looks to be a straightforward case, I doubt it will take very long.”

From there it’s easy for him to go into business mode as he goes over the details of the case with Taeyong. He’s surprised to find him to be so soft-spoken and cooperative, an uncommon trait for people in this industry. If he ignores glaringly large distraction from his past, this might actually be one of the smoothest cases he’s ever taken on.

And anyway, Doyoung is making it easier for him to ignore him too. He hasn’t spoken up once; Ten, who he learns is Doyoung’s assistant, takes over when it comes to the more administrative stuff, but he can tell that if he were anyone else, Doyoung would probably taking on a far larger role in this meeting. Doyoung also hasn’t looked up at Jaehyun again, his eyes remain either trained to the floor or on Taeyong. 

Taeyong looks up at Doyoung often as well, concern flitting over his features, especially when he gets into the grittier details of the night of his attack. From the way Doyoung’s expression immediately softens every time they make eye contact, it’s clear he’s someone important to him. He’s curious to find out the nature of their relationship but stops himself before he thinks too deeply about it, before his curiosity turns into something more dangerous. It wasn’t any of his business anyway, Doyoung was nothing but his client and practically a stranger.

Neither Taeyong nor Ten comment on Doyoung’s silence. He wonders if anyone else notices the weird tension building in the room, or if he’s just imagining it all in his head. He probably is, and he’s frustrated with himself for being so affected. He was just an ex, albeit one whose heart he broke after a decade and a half together and one he never thought he’d see again in his lifetime, but just an ex nonetheless.

The meeting draws to a close rather quickly and smoothly. He has all the information he needs to get started and they arrange a follow-up appointment for two weeks time.

“Thank you again, Jaehyun,” Taeyong says graciously, “ You’ve made me feel a lot better about this already. I look forward to working with you further.”

Ten flashes him a bright smile, “It was nice to meet you, I knew you’d be good at your job but I didn’t expect you to be handsome as well.”

Jaehyun laughs lightly and Taeyong gives a little shrug in agreement. “Ten, you’re married,” Doyoung says coldly from where he’s sitting.

It’s the first thing he’s said the entire meeting and it catches them all off guard, eyes all turning towards him. The comment doesn’t seem to bother Ten though, who only rolls his eyes at Doyoung, “Kun won’t mind if I flirt a little, especially if it’s with a face like  _ that _ .”

He looks over at Jaehyun’s face for emphasis but Doyoung’s eyes don’t follow. His mouth has tightened into a thin line and he’s staring daggers at his assistant.

“Doyoung, you’ve been so on-edge this entire meeting,” Ten sighs dramatically, “I don’t get how you can be a big fancy songwriter and still not know how to talk to good-looking men. Be polite.”

Doyoung offers a stiff looking smile in response but still doesn’t look at Jaehyun.

Ten shakes his head and turns to Jaehyun, “Ignore him. Doyoung is just a prude, doesn’t he look at a prude?”

Jaehyun freezes and Doyoung suddenly coughs loudly. Jaehyun feels a nagging urge inside of him to defend Doyoung and tell Ten he’s wrong. He bites his tongue and quickly pushes the feeling back down inside him as far as it can possibly go. Not only would it be awkward and confusing for everyone involved, but highly inappropriate as well.

It seems he’s not the only one wanting to prove Ten wrong because as soon as Jaehyun buries his own urge, Taeyong speaks up.

“Doyoung’s not a prude,” he says pointedly, placing a hand on Doyoung’s shoulder in reassurance, “trust me on that.”

“Ew,” is all Ten says in response but drops the topic.

Something ugly settles at the bottom of his stomach as Jaehyun starts to process the implication of Taeyong’s words. There’s no reason he should be feeling any of this, yet he feels his insides start to churn when Doyoung whispers a soft  _ thank you _ back to Taeyong. Again, he reminds himself, this was  _ none of his business _ .

There’s a bit of awkwardness in the air but they brush past it, thanking him once again. Except for Doyoung of course, who remains silent and stony. 

Jaehyun waits until Ten walks him out of the studio, until he’s reached the ground floor and walked out the building, until he’s gotten in his car and driven away. He waits until he’s reached his law firm and dropped off his files with the secretary. He waits until he’s closed the door to his office and sat down at his desk before he allows himself to feel everything he’s been holding back. 

He allows himself to retrace the memories that he’s been suppressing since the moment he saw Doyoung again. It hurts more than he thought it would. As much as he thought it would never actually happen, he imagined this moment before. It’s been so long that he assumed it wouldn’t affect him so much, but now in the privacy of his own office, his memories feel as fresh as the day Doyoung walked out the door, all the guilt, pain, and resentment flooding back to him.

He doesn’t know if he should be surprised to see Doyoung doing so well, doesn’t know if he should be happy. He’s clearly found success in this cushy looking songwriter position, and probably receiving a hefty paycheck as well if he were able to afford a lawyer of Jaehyun’s price range. And it wasn’t even for himself.  _ Taeyong _ , he’d wondered what sort of relationship he had with Doyoung and he got his answer.

Even after 5 years, he’d never once imagined Doyoung would find someone else. He should have seen this coming, just because he was still alone, didn’t mean Doyoung would be as well. Especially not with his lifestyle and personality. Even so, the revelation is difficult to wrap his head around and unsettling. The logical part of his brain tells him he should be happy for Doyoung. From what he had seen today, aside with being gorgeous, Taeyong seems like an all-around pretty great person and out of everyone Doyoung could be with, he’s glad it’s someone like him. That doesn’t stop his stomach from clenching at the idea of them together. 

It makes Jaehyun wonder just would have happened if he didn’t ask for a break all those years ago, or even if he’d actually kept his word and called Doyoung after. It’s a dangerous thought to be contemplating but he can’t stop himself. Would they still be together now? Would he still be working as a high-profile lawyer and Doyoung a successful songwriter?

For the sake of his sanity, he has to tell himself no. He still remembers the whole reason he never reached out after their “break”. It had been a couple of months since Doyoung left the apartment and school had calmed now a bit and Jaehyun along with it. It was a difficult few months for him, he missed Doyoung every day but the separation gave him time to think about what he truly wanted. Doyoung, that was the conclusion he had reached, he wanted Doyoung and was ready to call him and beg him to take him back.

But then he saw the announcement that the band was going to debut. One of the other band members had probably posted it on their social media pages and Jaehyun came across it incidentally one day. It gave him pause to reach out. This was it, Doyoung’s dreams were finally coming true and it was all happening now that Jaehyun was out of the picture. He couldn’t help but question whether or not  _ he’d  _ been the reason they were never able to succeed until now if  _ he _ was what had held Doyoung back from reaching his full potential. What if trying to get back with Doyoung would only get in his way?

He chickened out from there. Buried himself in his studies and made it to law school, graduated and became the lawyer he’d always dreamed of being. It was not nearly as satisfying as he had hoped.

He remembers seeing Doyoung’s band on the scene for a bit, they did moderately well on the charts. Jaehyun had even attended one of their shows in the beginning. He stood in the crowd along with hundreds of others singing Doyoung’s lyrics back to him. Lyrics so hateful that Jaehyun knew in his gut were written about him. He doesn’t know what he expected from that show. Maybe for Doyoung to look into the crowd and find him, meet his eyes and they’d fall back into each other's arms again? It was a stupid thought and obviously didn’t happen. The night ended with Jaehyun sneaking out of the venue early to crawl into bed with Doyoung’s lyrics playing in his head and tear tracks staining his cheeks.

The band sort of disappeared after two years. While Jaehyun noticed their absence, he never looked into what had become of the members, or more specifically, what had become of Doyoung. He’s not sure if it was because enough time had passed for him to not want to know, or not enough time had passed for him to be brave enough to find out.

It doesn’t matter, he got his answer three years later and it doesn’t help to reassure him of his fears that  _ he  _ was the one preventing Doyoung from greatness. And now that he has Taeyong, he can’t even consider thoughts about maybe trying again after all these years. 

Jaehyun buries his face in his hands. He vaguely acknowledges that his eyes are wet. Even if Doyoung were single, Jaehyun doesn’t think he deserves to entertaining this idea, not when he was the one who destroyed them in the first place. The least he could do now was try to apologize and maybe finally offer some sort of closure.

-

Doyoung breathes out a sigh of relief the moment Jaehyun leaves the room. He can feel Taeyong’s eyes following him as he paces around the studio in an attempt to calm down. He’s still trying to process the fact that  _ that _ really happened and he wasn’t ready for the inevitable rain of questions from Taeyong. Taeyong knows him far too well to not have noticed something was off about him during the meeting,  _ hell _ , even Ten noticed. 

He sits back down again, this time right next to Taeyong,  _ where Jaehyun sat _ , he thinks before scowling at himself for even having that thought. He shakes his head and turns his attention to Taeyong. Today is supposed to be about him and Doyoung wasn’t going to let some ghost from his past make things harder than they’ve already been for Taeyong.

It still pains him to see Taeyong like this, he doesn’t think he’ll ever be used to seeing the ugly bruises marring his face, or the large bandage he knows hides a lengthy row of stitches underneath. It’s unfair that this had to happen to Taeyong, no one in the world was less deserving of such horrible treatment and Doyoung wishes whole-heartedly that it would have been him instead. As much as Taeyong doesn’t want him to blame himself for this whole mess, Doyoung can’t help but think that maybe if he had been there, he would have been able to defend him that night. Instead, he was halfway across the world trying to smooth-talk another high-profile artist into a collaboration. No collaboration, no matter how hot the artist was right now, was worth this.

Doyoung wants nothing more than to find the disgusting bastard who did this to Taeyong all because he wouldn’t  _ put out _ for and beat him up within an inch of his life. Taeyong wouldn’t want that though, so he had to settle for the next best thing of suing him for all that’s he’s worth. 

“Does his hurt?” he asks gently, brushing over a particularly nasty mark under his eye.

“Not really,” Taeyong answers, reaching out to take hold on Doyoung’s hand on his face, clasping their fingers together and placing both their hands in his lap instead, “it could have been much worse.”

“It’s still not fair,” he mumbles but accepts Taeyong’s answer; at least he wasn’t in pain.

“Okay, what the hell was wrong with you today?” Ten interrupts loudly as he pops back into the studio with a glare directed right at Doyoung.

He sighs, this was exactly what he’d been trying to avoid.

“Nothing,” he says firmly, “I’m just not feeling well. It must have been the plane food I had earlier today.”

Ten scoffs, he doesn’t believe him, “That still doesn’t give you an excuse to be so rude to Jaehyun. What did he ever do to you? You’ve only just met him!”

Doyoung wants to laugh because Jaehyun has done more than enough for him to warrant this kind of reaction. Not that he’d ever tell Ten, this was a part of him he wanted to be buried and locked away. Preferably with the key thrown away as well.

“Ten just go home,” he commands, mostly out of frustration, “I don’t need you for the rest of today.”

Ten looks like he wants to argue, but stops himself when he sees Taeyong give him a pleading look. He mutters a  _ yes boss _ under his breath before stomping out of the studio.

Doyoung looks down at the floor, he can practically feel Taeyong’s brain whirring from where he’s seated.

“Do you want to tell me what this was all about?” he questions him softly, placing a hand on his knee.

“No,” Doyoung replies stubbornly but looks up at Taeyong anyways.

Taeyong offers him a small smile, “Is it something to do with Jaehyun? I noticed you started acting strangely the moment he entered the room. You were the one who hired him, but if you don’t like him, it’s not too late to switch lawyers.”

This was kind of his own fault. He  _ was _ the one who hired Jaehyun. Technically, it was Ten who had sought him out but Doyoung had been the one to ask him to find the best lawyer in the business for Taeyong, no matter the cost. 

Doyoung shakes his head at Taeyong, “No, it’s fine. I promised I’d get you the best and Jaehyun is the best.”

“Only if you’re sure,” Taeyong tries to emphasize, “I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. I worry about you.”

Doyoung laughs humourlessly, “I’m supposed to be the one worrying about  _ you _ .”

Taeyong leans his head on Doyoung’s shoulder, “You do enough of that already. It hurts me more to see something bothering you, now tell me what’s wrong.”

His voice is gentle yet stern and Doyoung can tell that he’s being serious. He’s been meaning to tell Taeyong about Jaehyun, at least he has been over the last few years, but it never felt like the right time. Seeing Jaehyun again only made things more complicated, digging up a whole slew of old emotions Doyoung didn’t think he was strong enough to face. 

“Jaehyun,” he begins hesitantly, “is someone I used to know. I haven’t seen him in a few years.”

Taeyong hums but doesn’t say anything, he’s waiting for Doyoung to elaborate.

“We,” he struggles to find the right words, “had a falling out of sorts. It was a long time ago, it doesn’t matter now. All that matters is that he’s a good lawyer and gets you the justice you deserve.”

Taeyong lifts his head off his shoulder to look at Doyoung’s face, searching to see if he’s telling the truth. He doesn’t quite look convinced, it’s clear he had hoped for a more detailed explanation but it’s obvious Doyoung’s done talking now. He doesn’t push him any further, and for that, Doyoung is grateful. He lets Taeyong rest his back on his shoulder and they sit in comfortable silence.

It’s still surreal for Doyoung, to actually see Jaehyun again. He’s spent so many years trying so hard to forget about him that he wants to cry out at how unfair is it that just one simple meeting, one where they didn’t even say a single word to each other, was able to crumble down the walls he’s spent so long building up.

It’s unfair because it comes at a time where he’s finally been doing well and feeling okay about himself again, finally starting to think that he’s gotten over Jaehyun. But now, he feels like the slightest trigger could revert him back to spending sleepless nights miserably alone in bed, wishing he were in Jaehyun’s arms instead.

His fingers tighten around the warm hand still wrapped in his. His only saving grace is having Taeyong by his side, with his quiet comfort and sweet reassurances, he’s not sure if he'd be able to handle this alone. Doyoung was in the darkest place he’d ever been in when they had first met. The band had just fallen apart and he’d helped him when he had nothing else left. Taeyong was the one who dug him out of the suffocating hole he’d buried himself into, healing his wounds and building him back up until he started to resemble that confident, passionate man who loved his life before everything had fallen apart. He was the one who pushed Doyoung into songwriting and production and in turn, he had pushed Taeyong towards his own dreams. 

He only hopes that Taeyong will be enough to keep his head above water this time. It shouldn’t have to be this hard. All he has to do is remind himself that Jaehyun was nothing but their lawyer, avoid him outside of professional settings, and it would all be over before he knew it. 

It’s not like Jaehyun had paid him all that much attention either. After his initial shock of seeing him, he went straight to work, addressing Taeyong and Ten like he wasn’t even there. Not that Doyoung thinks he would have been much help anyway. He spent the entire meeting two seconds away from running out of the room and locking himself in the restroom.

He’s not sure what he’d expected from seeing Jaehyun again, but it certainly wasn’t this. It was like he could hardly recognize the man before him. Sure, he more or less looked the same, maybe a little taller and broader, but it like the entire core of him, what made him  _ Jaehyun _ , at least to Doyoung, was absent. It was so disorienting he could barely even look him in the face.

The Jaehyun he remembers had always been so expressive with a pair of bright, sparkling eyes, even when he was upset. Doyoung remembers how Jaehyun’s face used to be so easy to read, betraying every little thing he felt, but now, Doyoung could hardly decipher a single emotion. It’s hard to imagine the man he met today was the same boy he fell in love once upon a time with that used to blush easily and giggle at everything every other thing Doyoung said.  He wonders if this Jaehyun was even capable of that full-dimpled smile that used to make Doyoung’s heart melt.

He shakes off the memory, it would do him no good to dwell on that now. Taeyong must have noticed him fidgeting because he speaks up again, “Don’t forget that I’m always here for you. Just let me know if it gets too much and we’ll call the whole thing off.”

Doyoung offers a small smile, “I know, thank you.”


	2. Walk the Line

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello here's chap two enjoy!

Jaehyun is anxious for this meeting, to see  _ Doyoung  _ again. He knows his main focus should be on the case but that doesn’t stop him from running through endless scenarios in his head about how he’s going to approach Doyoung. He’s already made the decision to try and properly talk to him this time. He doesn’t really have much of an objective other than to apologize and ask that they be civil with each other, if only for the sake of the case. If it goes well and he’s lucky, maybe he’ll even ask if they can be friends again. He shouldn’t get ahead of himself, Jaehyun doubts he’ll be so lucky.

Like the last meeting, Ten greets him when he exits the elevator and walks him to the studio. Jaehyun makes sure to arrive early this time, he still has a professional reputation to maintain. The studio is quiet when he enters and he tries to quickly mentally prepare himself for how he’s going to approach greeting Doyoung this time. 

He has it in his head to be professional yet friendly, or at least to not freeze like he did last time, but the sight before him makes his breath catch in his throat and the churning feeling return to this stomach. Taeyong is lying with his head in Doyoung’s lap, as Doyoung softly runs his fingers through his hair. Both their eyes are closed and Doyoung is humming a soft tune under his breath.

The scene feels awfully familiar to Jaehyun, god knows how many times he’d been in that position himself, Doyoung’s long fingers buried in his hair. It had always Doyoung’s go-to method for helping them both relax, and it seems like that much hasn’t changed over the years. Jaehyun can almost feel the ghost of the memory of his touch on his scalp. He shakes his head in an attempt to clear the feeling. That touch didn’t belong to him anymore.

He doesn’t want to interrupt, but he also wants to get this meeting over and done with. Before he can clear his throat to try and catch their attention, Doyoung’s eyes fly open. He looks directly at Jaehyun for only a moment before moving his eyes down to Taeyong, gently nudging at his head to tell him to get up. Doyoung shows little sign of surprise at Jaehyun’s presence, a complete contrast to Taeyong who flushes in embarrassment, quickly getting up and apologizing for not noticing him sooner.

“Let me know if you need me,” Doyoung says quietly to Taeyong before standing up and walking across to the other end of the room and taking a seat in front of a large mixing console.

He puts on a pair of headphones and immediately begins fiddling with the switches and buttons in front of him.

“Don’t mind him,” Taeyong interrupts, capturing Jaehyun’s attention, “he’s just finishing up a song and won’t be able to take part in the meeting today.”

Jaehyun nods, letting his eyes sweep over Doyoung one last time before forcing himself to focus back on the task at hand. A twinge of disappointment washes over him, but then again it’s not like Doyoung really took part last time either. Ten takes the lead for most of the meeting this time, asking Jaehyun questions and taking notes as they go over their options and next steps. 

He can’t help but notice Taeyong looking over at him strangely every once in a while, with an inquisitive look in his eyes. His gaze isn’t unfriendly, perhaps just a little confused and curious as if he’s trying to piece together something in his mind. Every time Jaehyun catches him staring, he just plays it off with a small smile and urges him to keep talking about the case.

This attention was new and Jaehyun wasn’t too sure how he felt about it. It makes him wonder just how much Doyoung had told them about their past relationship since their last encounter. Somehow, the image of Doyoung revealing their past to his current boyfriend didn’t sit well with him. He can only imagine what kind of light Doyoung would have painted him in.

The meeting flies by faster than the last one, perhaps due to the lack of the distraction of his ex-boyfriend and best friend sitting right in front of him this time. They are all standing up and beginning to say their goodbye’s by the time Doyoung finally removes his headphones and gets up from his chair himself. He barely glances over Jaehyun, walking over directly to stand by Taeyong’s side.

Taeyong gives his arm a little squeeze when he joins him, eyes briefly flicking between him and Doyoung.

“How was the meeting?” Doyoung asks, at no one in particular, “I apologize for not being able to join, I just have a deadline I have to meet for the current piece I’m working on.”

It catches Jaehyun off guard, to hear Doyoung speaking. His tone is stiff and formal and Jaehyun isn’t sure if he should be the one to answer the question. He’s not sure if Doyoung wants  _ him _ to answer the question. Fortunately, Ten speaks up before he has to. 

“It went smoothly, probably more so than if you’d actually been there,” he says cheekily and Doyoung rolls his eyes, “I’ll forward you the notes later.”

Doyoung gives a curt nod, “Now if you’ll excuse me.”

A mild sense of panic washes over Jaehyun as Doyoung starts to walk towards the door. He couldn’t just  _ leave _ , Jaehyun still hadn’t had a chance to talk to him yet. He steels himself, if he wanted to do this, he had to act now.

“Wait,” he calls out, perhaps a bit too loudly, causing everyone to turn to him with confused expressions.

Jaehyun clears his throat and tries to make himself sound as cool as possible, it’s a stark contrast to his racing heart, “Doyoung can I talk to you for a moment? Alone?”

He can tell Doyoung wasn’t expecting this request because he freezes on the spot, letting out a little noise of surprise. Taeyong gives him a little look of concern, moving quickly to step towards him, “I’m not sure that’s the best idea, Doyoung is busy right now-”

“Two minutes,” Doyoung interrupts Taeyong, “I’ll give you two minutes.”

Jaehyun nods, it was better than nothing. Doyoung proceeds to continue to walk out of the studio, however this time, he gestures for Jaehyun to follow with a quick jerk of his head. While the middle of a hallway isn’t the ideal place Jaehyun would like to have this conversation, he’s low on options and Doyoung had his arms crossed tightly over his chest and is looking more and more impatient by the second.

“You wanted to talk, now talk,” he commands harshly.

Jaehyun sighs, this was already getting off to a bad start.

“We haven’t seen each other in years,” he tries to explain, “I know you have Taeyong now but I just wanted to catch up a little — ”

Doyoung scoffs, “that was your choice. I’m not interested in  _ catching up _ . Now unless there’s something you need to discuss from the case, I think we’re done talking.”

This was certainly not the reaction he had been hoping for. A part of him knew this could happen, but to actually have Doyoung glare at him, eyes cold and unfeeling as he refused to hear a single word was more disheartening than he could have imagined. It was clear he wanted nothing to do with him and the worst part was, Jaehyun probably deserved it.

“I’m sorry,” he tries again, deciding to go straight to the point, “I know I hurt you-”

“Stop,” Doyoung says, voice wavering slightly, “It doesn’t matter now.”

And with that, Doyoung walks past him and back into the studio, leaving him alone. Ten pops into the hallway a few seconds later, a nervous smile plastered on his face.

“Ready to go?” he laughs awkwardly and Jaehyun only nods solemnly, allowing him to lead him towards the exit. 

He tries not to wince when he hears the door slam behind him.

-

Doyoung stalks back into the room, waves of emotion pulsing through his body. He can’t quite figure out exactly how he’s feeling right now. It’s not quite anger but there is definitely a sense of frustration present. It was an impulsive move to walk out on Jaehyun, he hadn’t had much of a plan when he had agreed to speak with him, but in hindsight, perhaps he was a little harsh. Maybe if he had more self-control he would have politely refused the request in the first place, but the moment Jaehyun made the request, his curiosity got the best of him. 

Or maybe he just wanted to be able to yell at him and tell him off.

He shoots Ten a glare and he immediately scrambles out of the room wordlessly. Even  _ he _ can tell that Doyoung isn’t for his usual teasing remarks. Doyoung makes sure to shut the door, perhaps with a little too much force, the second he leaves.

Taeyong immediately walks over to him with a puzzled expression on his face, carefully wrapping his arms around him and pulling him onto the couch. Doyoung turns his head down, burying it against Taeyong’s chest to avoid his gaze.

“I don’t know what that was,” he says quietly, “I don’t know what I acted like that.”

Taeyong hums, “what happened out there?”

Doyoung shrugs, “he wanted to talk and I-I just lost it.”

The whole purpose of the bullshit excuse of  _ working on his music _ was to avoid having to interact with Jaehyun, to avoid finding himself in this sort of situation. He feels a lump forming in his throat and he wants to scoff in disbelief.  _ Was he really going to cry from a two-minute conversation with his ex? _ He hates that he can already feel tears begin to sting his eyes when he’s not even sure what he even has to be upset about.

“It’s alright,” Taeyong shushes him, pressing soft kisses into his hair, “let it out.”

Doyoung pulls back with a sniffle, “I don’t even know why I’m crying right now, he shouldn’t be able to still affect like this.”

Taeyong gently lifts his chin and wipes away his tears with his thumb, “There’s nothing wrong with crying, did something happen out there? Did Jaehyun do something to you?”

Doyoung shakes his head. If he’s honest, Jaehyun barely did anything at all. He was the one who couldn’t take it, successfully being reduced to a mess with even the slightest mention of their past relationship. It was like all of these pent up emotions he’d spent so much effort trying to suppress were finally breaching the surface again. So much for  _ being over it _ , he thinks bitterly.

“Then what’s wrong,” Taeyong asks with worry evident in his voice, “I can see that you’re hurting and I need you to tell me the truth so I can help you.”

Taeyong peers down at him, eyes wide and full of concern. Doyoung sighs,  _ oh what the hell _ , he was already crying so he might as well get it all out in one go.

He takes a deep breath, “I met Jaehyun when he was 5 and I was 6…”

It’s surprisingly simple to tell Taeyong this story, the memories come easily to him from all the years he’s spent retracing them both before and after the breakup. He can’t help but let a smile escape as he recounts the earlier days when all they had were each other and nothing else matters. He tells Taeyong about how he fell in love with Jaehyun, when they shared their first kiss, and when they first moved in together. Doyoung thinks details are probably unnecessary for Taeyong to know, but if he’s going to finally get this off his chest, he wants to do it right and share the full story. 

He pauses before he gets to that part where they fell apart, the last six months they’d spent that didn’t even feel like they were even together at all. Taeyong rubs a calming hand on his back. He listens intently but doesn’t interrupt or ask questions, not even when Doyoung stumbles over his words or gets parts confused. He’s never really been very good at verbally expressing himself, especially when it came to feelings. He’d much rather bare his soul with a pen and paper via his lyrics. 

“I came home one day and he asked if we could take a break,” he says slowly, “he promised to call and never did.”

It sounds so simple when he says it out loud, so ridiculously simple that he could sum up the ending of over a decade and a half of love with barely two sentences. Doyoung wants to laugh.

Taeyong uses both his hands to gently cup Doyoung’s cheeks and lift his head to look at him, “I’m sorry, you shouldn’t have to go through this for me. It’s still not too late to kick him off the case.”

“I told you,” Doyoung assures him, “It’s in the past now. Today was an anomaly, it won’t happen again.”

Taeyong sighs, “you’re too stubborn for your own good,” but doesn’t push any more than that.

He releases his grasp on Doyoung’s cheeks and allows him to rest his head back on his chest. Taeyong is probably right, but he’s determined to put today behind him. He has to admit that he does feel a little lighter after getting all that off his chest. Perhaps part of it had to do with getting yelling at Jaehyun out of his system, but also finally being able to share one of the largest pieces of his life with Taeyong. 

-

Jaehyun orders himself another beer. He often finds himself here when he’s feeling lost. He’s at the same club he used to go with Doyoung to. It’s funny how that now feels like a lifetime ago. He’d gone straight here after the meeting, not even bothering to stop by the office this time. Usually, he’d bury himself in work during times of distress but he can’t even do that now because work just reminds him of Doyoung. Maybe this was a sign to just give up; Doyoung didn’t seem like he’d be willing to hear him out any time soon.

Then again, maybe it was a good sign Doyoung acted the way he did, it was better than if he’d treated him with complete indifference. At least this meant that Doyoung cared in some shape, regardless of whether his feelings were positive or negative. Although it probably wouldn’t be doing him much of a favour to try apologizing again, especially if Doyoung were to react similarly. It’s clear that he’s moved on and if Jaehyun were in his position, he doubts he’d want an ex who dumped him to be bringing up their past in front his current boyfriend.

If only he could have done the same and moved on as well.

As if on cue, he feels a body slide up next to him and he turns to see a smiling face peering over at him.

“You look like you could use something stronger than a beer,” the stranger asks, his voice is softer than Jaehyun has anticipated, “Can I buy you a drink?”

_ He’s cute _ , Jaehyun thinks, with soft features that would give off an air of innocence if it weren’t for the mischievous twinkle in his eyes. He would do just fine for what Jaehyun needed tonight. He plasters a grin on his face, the same one he uses to charm clients and potential hookups like this, the one he knows works every time.

“No thanks,” he says, making sure to keep his voice light, “I’d rather buy you one instead.”

The stranger giggles and leans in closer, “I’m Jungwoo, and you are?”

“Jaehyun,” he says, placing a hand lightly on Jungwoo’s thigh, “now what will you be having tonight?”

Flirting, when broken down, was really quite simple. Or at least it was to Jaehyun; it helped when he had a face like his. Besides he’s had enough practice in the last couple of years to woo just about anyone into bed with him. It’s not a fact that he’s proud of, but it’s the reality he lives in.

Jaehyun had tried dating at first, he’d never really thought of himself as the hookup type, especially after pining after the same guy for the better part of his entire adolescence and young adulthood. His  _ post-Doyoung _ relationships never lasted though, he’d usually get dumped for not  _ being invested _ in the relationship enough or he’d find some excuse to break it off himself. He’d never learned how to be in a relationship with anyone except Doyoung. He had always assumed that he wouldn’t have to learn, that he’d eventually marry Doyoung and they’d spend the rest of their lives together. 

That’s when he moved on to hookups and one-night-stands. They were quick and easy, fulfilling both his physical needs and temporarily filling the void of loneliness inside him. This has been his life for so long now that he can’t even imagine himself settling down with anyone anymore.

Jaehyun thinks that he should be satisfied with this. Every other aspect of his life is nearly perfect. He’s got the degree he’s always wanted and even successfully set up his own firm. Sometimes he’ll let himself wonder if he’s truly happy, although he doesn’t do it often because he already knows the answer. He knows what’s missing and he knows it’s impossible to fix now and he knows it’s his own fault. 

It doesn’t take long for Jaehyun to have Jungwoo breathless and backed up against the door of a bathroom stall. He wastes time in attaching their lips together in a messy kiss as he fumbles to undo the button of his jeans. He supposes this feels good, on a physical surface level; Jungwoo’s lips are soft and his hands are gentle as they find their way under Jaehyun’s shirt. It’s usually enough to satisfy him, but tonight, for some reason, his body craves that all-consuming fire he hasn’t felt in so long. He knows there’s no use searching for that here, but that doesn’t lessen the longing feeling in his chest.

The fuzzy image of an all-too-familiar face flashes behind his eyelids and for a moment he lets himself get lost in it before he remembers where he is and who he’s with. His eyes fly open with a gasp and Jungwoo pauses from where he’s been kissing down his neck to give Jaehyun a questioning look. 

Jaehyun shakes his head in an attempt to clear it. Maybe he’s had too much to drink. He never lets his mind wander  _ there _ when he’s with his hookups, it’s far too risky that he’ll fall down a hole he won’t be able to get himself out of. 

Jungwoo’s expression transforms into one of concern and he reaches to place a hand on Jaehyun’s cheek which he instinctively swats away.

“I don’t think I can do this,” he says, pushing himself away.

Jungwoo’s face falls for just a second before he nods and puts on an understanding smile, “You looked pretty down earlier, rough breakup?”

Jaehyun can’t even bring himself to say no.

“You should go home and get some rest,” Jungwoo pats Jaehyun’s shoulder lightly, “I wouldn’t recommend hooking up with strangers at a bar to get over someone.”

Jaehyun definitely doesn’t tell him that’s exactly what he’s spent the last five years doing.

“Sorry for wasting your time,” he apologizes.

“It’s alright, you were a good kisser,” Jungwoo says with a shrug, “I just hope you feel better soon.”

He gives him one last reassuring smile before disappearing out of the stall with a wave.

Jaehyun had come here tonight to  _ forget  _ about Doyoung, but as he leaves, Doyoung has never been more at the forefront of his mind. 

-

“Thanks for staying over tonight,” Doyoung says, exiting the bathroom.

Taeyong hums from where he’s already tucked in under Doyoung’s sheets in the centre of his bed, “Anytime, your bed is so much softer than mine anyway.”

Doyoung rolls his eyes as he gets in bed as well. He makes a poor attempt to shove Taeyong aside to make room for himself but eventually gives up when he doesn’t budge and Doyoung settles with wrapping his arms around him instead.

“How are you feeling?” Taeyong asks.

“Better now,” Doyoung replies honestly, “I think talking about it helped.”

“I’m glad,” he replies before pausing, he looks like he wants to say more but ultimately clamps his mouth shut again.

This doesn’t escape Doyoung’s notice. “What is it?” he says with a frown.

Taeyong sighs, “I didn’t want to mention it earlier because you seemed to have enough on your mind but —”

“Just spit it out.”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed but Jaehyun thinks we’re dating.”

“Oh,” Doyoung should have known this topic would come up, “I know that already.”

“Well, are you going to tell him the truth?”

Doyoung squeezes Taeyong closer to him in an attempt to hide his face, “No. What’s the point, it’s none of his business anyway? Not like I can casually bring it up in conversation.”

Taeyong wriggles himself out of Doyoung’s grasp and from the look on his face, Doyoung already knows he’s in for a lecture. Maybe he should have pretended to be distraught for longer just to get him to leave him alone. 

“You’re doing this on purpose, aren't you,” he accuses with narrowed eyes, “I was wondering why you were being touchier than usual.”

Doyoung huffs, purposely avoiding Taeyong’s glare. He should have known that he’d catch on to that, Taeyong knew him too well not to. With how they were constantly attached at the hip, it wasn’t uncommon for people to assume that they were dating. Jaehyun had always been quick to believe what was put in front of him and Doyoung had figured he probably concluded that he and Taeyong were together right from the start. It was easier this way, to distance himself, and he had no intention of coming clean anytime soon.

Taeyong however, seems to have other plans.

“If you don’t tell him I will.”

“Don’t you dare,” he splutters out, “it will be so awkward if you do.”

Taeyong pokes him in the side, “It’s  _ already _ awkward. I don’t feel comfortable having him think we’re  _ together _ .”

“I’m insulted,” Doyoung says with an affronted gasp, “does the idea of us being together disgust you that much?”

“I’m being serious, Doyoung. I see the way he looks at you, I can tell that he still cares for you. Dare I even say he looks jealous of us at times,” Taeyong adds a little laugh at the end although Doyoung can’t see how this could possibly be any laughing matter.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he scoffs, “It’s been five years, any reasonable person would be over now.”

Taeyong gives him a pointed look, “Are you saying you’re not a reasonable person?”

Doyoung gives him a scowl but Taeyong ignores it and continues to speak, “I know you’ve noticed it too, even if you’re pretending to yourself that you haven't. If we are going to be working with him you should try being nicer, and that starts with telling him we aren’t dating.”

Doyoung groans into his pillow. “ _ I don’t want to _ ,” he whines, knowing he sounds like a child but doesn’t care, Taeyong has seen and heard worse, “I’ll be nicer to him, I just don’t wanna tell him  _ that _ ,  _ it’s embarrassing _ . And you please don’t tell him either.”

He attempts to add a pout at the end for emphasis but Taeyong doesn’t look the least bit convinced.

“Doyoung.”

There was no way either Doyoung or Taeyong were going to have any sort of “we’re not dating” conversation with Jaehyun, at least not anytime in the near foreseeable future. It was time he changed tactics.

“Taeyong,” he starts, “just give me this one, as my best friend.”

Before Taeyong can come up with a rebuttal Doyoung is quick to add on, “I’ll give you Johnny’s number if you keep your mouth shut.”

This catches Taeyong’s attention and makes him pause in consideration. He’s been bugging Doyoung about getting him in contact with Johnny for months now. What he doesn’t know is that Johnny’s also been dropping hints about wanting to know about Taeyong. He wants to roll his eyes at his useless friends. He’d been waiting for the right opportunity to offer Johnny’s number as trade, and now with his dignity on the line he figures now was as good of a time as any.

“You’re joking right?” Taeyong asks slowly, the skepticism evident in his voice.

Doyoung shakes his head and moves to grab Taeyong’s phone from the nightstand, “I’m adding it into your contacts right now so you have to agree.”

Taeyong lets out an exasperated sigh but doesn’t stop him. From the corner of his eye, he can see Taeyong’s poor attempt at hiding a smile, “Fine, deal.”

“Just don’t forget about me when the two of you run off into the sunset together,” he says after he places the phone back down, this was one crisis averted.

Taeyong pulls him back down to his side and cuddles up against him again, “Aww, I could never forget about you,” he coos in the way Taeyong knows he hates, but nevertheless Doyoung relaxes against his best friend.

“You know,” Taeyong says after a pause, “If you're afraid of being lonely, you could try dating again too.”

Doyoung frowns, “Why do I need to do that when I have you?”

It’s a flimsy excuse at best but he really has no desire to get involved with anyone. He’s been focusing on his career and it’s not like he’s ever alone, he has enough friends to keep him company. At least, that’s the excuse he’s been telling himself for the last five years.

“You can’t rely on me forever,” Taeyong argues, “you deserve to have someone special for yourself.”

“I’ll think about it,” he mumbles, reaching over to switch off the light and signal to Taeyong that he’s done with this conversation.

Doyoung won’t lie, there are some days where he craves the idea of being in a relationship, craves the physical affection. He usually calls Taeyong over on those days and they watch movies and cuddle until the urge goes away. It’s not like he can just  _ put himself _ out there. He wouldn’t know where to start. The only real relationship he’s ever been in was with Jaehyun and even then, they fell in love as kids so he never really needed to learn  _ how to date. _

The one time he tried to pick anyone up after Jaehyun during a particularly lonely night at a bar three years back, ended in a drunken one-night stand with a stranger. That stranger turned out to be Taeyong, and they had mutually decided the next morning that as fun as the night before was, they were better off as friends. Doyoung doesn’t think he’s set foot into a bar ever since.

In his half-asleep state, he lets his thoughts drift over to Jaehyun. He wonders if Jaehyun has seen anyone since they broke up.  _ He has to have _ , he reasons, it’s been so long. Doyoung ignores how that thought sits uncomfortably inside of him. He thinks back on what Taeyong said earlier, about how Jaehyun looked jealous of the two of them. The sheer idea was absurd but he can’t help but wrack his brain in an attempt to remember how Jaehyun behaved during their meetings, only to draw a blank when he realizes that he’d purposely avoided looking at Jaehyun both times. Perhaps next time he could pay more attention, not because he actually cares if Jaehyun is jealous,  _ which he absolutely isn’t _ , but only to satisfy his own curiosity and prove Taeyong wrong.

 


	3. Trust Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it took so long but it's finally here, the last chapter of Encore AND my Extended Play series.

The last person Jaehyun expects to see again is Johnny. While they were friendly enough back in high school and college, he was always more of Doyoung’s friend and when they broke up, he and the rest of Doyoung’s bandmates naturally just fell out of touch. That’s why Jaehyun is surprised to see Johnny waving at him from across the cafe. 

“Jaehyun?” he asks with a wide smile as he approaches his table, “it’s been a while, how have you been?”

Jaehyun looks at him with wide eyes, shocked that he’s talking to him so good-naturedly. He would have expected a more hostile reaction from someone so close to Doyoung, especially when Johnny likely witnessed the worst of the break-up firsthand.

“Hi Johnny,” he gives a polite nod, “I’m doing well, how about you?”

Johnny launches into an elaborate explanation about how he’s preparing for a tour with Mark in this new band they’ve formed and Jaehyun can’t help but smile at how excited Johnny sounds. He hadn’t given much thought as to where the rest of the band members ended up after they disbanded but he’s glad to know that Johnny and Mark are still playing music. Next to Doyoung, those two had always been the most passionate about the band. 

“Do you still keep in touch with the rest of the band?” Jaehyun asks, suddenly interested.

Johnny nods, “It’s a bit difficult to find time with everyone’s crazy schedules but we try to get together for a reunion dinner every once in a while. Yuta’s a music teacher at an elementary school now, believe it or not. I guess he wasn’t cut out for the rockstar life. Doyoung does songwriting—”

Johnny stops suddenly and gives Jaehyun a worried look, having realized who he was talking about. “Sorry,” he says quickly but Jaehyun shakes his head with a tight smile. 

“It’s fine,” he tries to assure Johnny, “I know.”

Johnny looks gives him a curious look but doesn’t pry. It’s a bit awkward now and he can tell Johnny is struggling with what to say next. Luckily for both of them, before the silence can stretch on any longer, Johnny is distracted by a notification on his phone.

“I have to go now, my date’s here,” he says, “it was nice catching up.”

“Likewise,” Jaehyun says with a little wave and he watches as Johnny makes his way to the front of the cafe and right into the open arms of…  _ Taeyong _ ?

Jaehyun shakes his head, unsure if his eyes are playing tricks on him but nothing changes. It’s not like he could misrecognize a face like Taeyong’s anyway, especially when he has just spent his entire morning looking at it during their meeting. While it’s not odd that Johnny and Taeyong would know each other, Johnny had mentioned he was meeting a date and from how cozy the two of them looked, it seemed like Taeyong was this date. Jaehyun’s suspicions are only confirmed when Johnny leans down and gives Taeyong a quick peck on the lips before they leave the cafe hand in hand.

Jaehyun wants to throw up, there was no way Taeyong could do such a thing to Doyoung, let alone with Johnny, one of his friends. Then again, all Jaehyun knew about Taeyong was from their meetings, but even so, he didn’t seem like the type of person who would do something like.

_ It’s none of his business _ , Jaehyun thinks to himself. He knows it would do him no good to stick his nose where it didn’t belong but he can’t seem to stop himself. What he  _ should _ be doing is simply forgetting about it and heading home, but instead he finds himself crossing the street and stepping into SM Records for the second time today, although this time, his reasons didn’t have anything to do with work.

Jaehyun tries to reason with himself, if he were Doyoung, he would want to know. He was doing the right thing by telling him, regardless of what their past relationship was. Jaehyun fidgets as he waits for the elevator, this was all assuming that Doyoung would even talk to him. 

Ever since their little confrontation the other day, Doyoung has been noticeably absent from the meetings and Jaehyun wonders if that day had been the final straw to push him away. He hasn’t seen him for weeks now and he can’t help but feel disheartened every time Ten leads him past the closed door to Doyoung’s studio and into a conference room where they hold their meetings now. The worst part is Jaehyun knows he’s right there, inside his studio, he can even hear muffled music from behind the door sometimes. With the case coming to a close, Jaehyun was starting to doubt that he would ever see Doyoung again. 

Jaehyun walks down the familiar hallway, debating if he should turn back now.  _ No _ , he tells himself, _ Doyoung deserved to know if his boyfriend was potentially cheating on him. _ He stills right before he reaches the doorway of the studio. The doors are open, for the first time in weeks and he can hear shuffling coming from inside. Before he can even collect himself enough to enter the studio, Doyoung suddenly walks out, freezing in the place the second he sees Jaehyun. He stares at him with a blank look on his face before he suddenly turns around and walks right back into his studio without a word.

“Doyoung, wait,” Jaehyun calls out without thinking and begins to follow Doyoung into the studio.

Doyoung whips his head around with an alarmed look and Jaehyun is quick to hold his hands out in a way that shows he means no harm as he tries to figure how to explain to Doyoung why he is here.

“It’s about Taeyong,” he settles with, knowing that the mention of his boyfriend will catch his attention.

Doyoung’s face instantly changes from one of alarm to one of suspicion. “What about Taeyong?” he asks cautiously, “Is there something wrong with the case? Should I call Ten?”

Jaehyun quickly shakes his head, “No, no, it’s not about the case. I don’t know how to say this and I don’t know if you’ll even believe me but I just thought you deserved to know.”

Doyoung looks visibly confused now, “What are you talking about?”

Jaehyun takes a deep breath, he might as well get it out in one go, “I was at the cafe across the street and saw Taeyong kissing Johnny.”

There are two ways that Jaehyun had imagined Doyoung’s reaction would be; the first was immediate anger paired with accusations of Jaehyun making the whole thing up and the second being complete devastation at the revelation that his boyfriend was cheating. However, neither of these things happen. Instead, Doyoung just looks mildly irritated, pinching the bridge of his nose as he lets out a loud sigh.

“If Taeyong was here, he’d call this karma,” Doyoung mutters before he looks up at Jaehyun with irritation on his face, “I didn’t expect him to work so fast.”

Jaehyun fixes him with a confused look, “What are you talking about? Did you guys break up or something? Is that why you haven’t been showing up to the meetings?”

“No,” Doyoung sighs, “I guess I might as well tell you. Taeyong and I are not dating.”

Jaehyun blinks, still not fully comprehending, “So you did break up?”

Doyoung lets out an exasperated breath and shakes his head.

“We were never dating. Taeyong is just…” he pauses and looks down on the ground, “my best friend.”

“Oh,” is all Jaehyun says before looking down as well.

The explanation makes enough sense and explains why Taeyong would be out with Johnny, but Jaehyun isn’t sure if it's relief that he’s feeling right now. It’s as if he’d forgotten this was a role he could also be replaced in and hearing Doyoung call someone else his  _ best friend _ makes his stomach turn just as much as if Doyoung had called him his boyfriend. It’s almost laughable how Doyoung had so easily refilled that position in his life, a position that for himself, Jaehyun couldn’t fathom anyone else in the world but Doyoung holding.

Before he can dwell any further into his own self-pity, Jaehyun suddenly realizes how ridiculous he must look right now, running into Doyoung’s studio to accuse someone who wasn’t even his boyfriend of cheating. Doyoung probably thinks he’s an idiot for wasting his time like this.

“I’m sorry,” Jaehyun rushes out quickly, “I don’t know what I was thinking coming here.”

Doyoung raises a hand to stop him before he can run away, “It’s fine, it’s partially my fault anyway. I never bothered to correct you about Taeyong and I’s relationship. I thought it would be easier that way.”

It takes a moment for Jaehyun to process his words. Doyoung’s voice is even and serious but lacks any of the usual coldness it holds when he speaks with Jaehyun. If anything, he sounds a bit tired and apologetic. He’s know what this implies exactly but he’s beginning to realize that maybe Doyoung doesn’t have his life together as much as he had previously thought.

“Well, I’m sorry for bothering you anyway,” he says quietly, “I’m going to go now.”

Doyoung doesn’t say anything more and also doesn’t try to stop him as he hastily exits the studio with a curt nod.  _ This changes things _ , Jaehyun thinks, his mind abuzz with the revelation that Doyoung and Taeyong weren’t dating. Maybe this was the opportunity he needed to make things right and he wasn’t going to let Doyoung slip away so easily again. He had nothing to lose and for the first time in a long time, something to fight for. 

-

Like all things that Doyoung doesn’t want to deal with, he pushes his conversation with Jaehyun to the back of his mind.  _ It’s fine _ , he tries to tell himself. It’s already been weeks and he’s continued to avoid Jaehyun like he has been doing this whole time and he’s  _ totally fine _ . As soon as the case closes, he’ll never have to think about him again. If the thought of never seeing Jaehyun again rubs himself the wrong way, Doyoung doesn’t acknowledge it. 

It makes him uncomfortable to have all his cards on the table for Jaehyun to see and he doesn’t like how vulnerable that makes him. He doesn’t want to think about how pathetic he must look to him, pretending to have a boyfriend when he had barely even entertained the concept of dating in the last five years.

If Taeyong knew Jaehyun had found out the truth he’d start preaching about how it was the right thing to do and having a clear conscience, which was exactly the reason why Doyoung hadn’t told him yet. It was bad enough that he had to deal with his insecurities about being exposed, he didn’t need his best friend telling him how this was all for his own good when it really didn’t feel that way.

Doyoung’s phone buzzes and Ten’s name appears on the screen. He answers it without thinking, only to regret it not a moment later when Ten’s voice drawls out his name sweetly in a way that he knows means trouble.

“What do you want?” Doyoung sighs, knowing he might as well skip all the sweet-talking and head straight to why his assistant was calling him after hours.

Ten huffs, “ _ Why do you always assume I want something from you? _ ”

Doyoung doesn’t reply, simply letting out a hum to urge Ten to get to the point.

“ _ Fine, _ ” Ten concedes, probably because he doesn’t want to stay on this call any longer than Doyoung does, “ _ You know how the big meeting to reach a settlement for Taeyong’s case is tomorrow? _ ”

Doyoung hums again.

“ _ Well, I may or may not have left some important case files on my desk that Jaehyun needs to have by tonight. I was going to drop them off at his office after work but I forgot. _ ”

Doyoung’s furrows his brow, “So? Just come back and grab them. What does this have to do with me?”

Ten sighs, “ _ Normally I would and I said I would bother you with anything related to the case but I’m out with Kun right now for our anniversary dinner and I know for a fact that you’re still at your studio. _ ”

Doyoung groans out loud. He wants so badly to say no, to argue and come up with any sort of excuse as to why he can’t deliver the file but he knows that he can’t. Ten has already done so much for Taeyong and the case and the last thing Doyoung wants to do is interrupt his anniversary dinner when he knows that Ten rarely gets to opportunity to spend quality time with his husband.

“ _ Please Doyoung, you know I wouldn’t ask you if I had any other option. All you have to do is drop it off at his office with his secretary. You don’t even have to talk to Jaehyun. _ ”

Doyoung hates how obvious it is to Ten that the idea of seeing Jaehyun is his main reason for hesitation, but it does make him feel a bit better at the guarantee that he won’t have to interact with him. 

“Alright,” he gives in, if only for the sake of making sure Taeyong’s case goes as smoothly as possible.

Ten lets out a pleased squeal, “ _ Thank you Doyoung, I owe you one. _ ”

 

Maybe the universe hates Doyoung, maybe some higher power out there just wants to see him suffer because he should have known this wouldn’t so easy. He’s standing outside the law office Jaehyun works out, case file clutched tightly in his hand as he tries to peek into the windows in search of any sign of life. He knows it’s a wasted effort, the lights are off and the doors are locked but it never hurts to be extra sure. It’s his own fault really, for deciding to stay at the studio for a little while longer before heading out, forgetting to take into account that other people actually work regular office hours.

To make matters worse, Ten has stopped answering his phone. Doyoung just hopes Ten has enjoyed his night enough to make up for his suffering. He stares at the file in his hand, the bolded letters on the front  _ JUNG JAEHYUN _ taunting him and reminding him of what little options he has left. He’s already promised Ten and come this far, he might as well see it through to the end.

He can feel himself fill with dread as he pulls up his contact list and scrolls to name he hasn’t touched in years. He’s not sure if it’s dumb or smart of him to have kept the contact after all these years, even making sure to import it onto each new phone he gets. He debates pressing the call button before chickening out and opening the messaging app instead. At least this way, Jaehyun wouldn’t be able to hear how stressed he was. 

**- _Hi_ , _I have your case file._**

Doyoung cringes at his own text. He holds his breath as he sees the text bubble that shows Jaehyun is typing appear. He belatedly realizes that he had forgotten to mention who he was, after all, he wasn’t keen on banking on the fact that Jaehyun might have saved his contact after all these years as well. 

All his assumptions are dashed when Jaehyun finally replies.

**- _Doyoung?_**

 

Doyoung sucks in a breath, everything feeling too real all of a sudden.

**_-Yes._ **

**_-Ten told me you need the file for tomorrow._ **

 

**_-Shit, yeah I’ve been looking everywhere for it_ **

**_-I tried to call Ten but he wasn’t picking up_ **

 

**_-I’ll bring it to you. Where are you right now?_ **

**_-I’m at home_ **

 

Doyoung stares at his screen in disbelief as Jaehyun sends an address next. The familiar numbers and street names make his head throb. There had to be some mistake, there was no way Jaehyun, a well-established lawyer was still living in that dingy little apartment they rented back when Jaehyun was in college. Doyoung pushes his discomfort down as he hails a cab to take him back to a place he didn’t think he’d ever see again.

Jaehyun opens the door before Doyoung is even finished knocking. He wouldn’t be surprised if he had been waiting there for him since their exchange of texts. As he steps through the threshold, Doyoung notices exactly three things.

The first thing he notices is that the apartment looks nothing like it used to. There have been some extensive renovations done on the interior to turn it into something more appropriate for someone of Jaehyun’s calibre but Doyoung still doesn’t see why he couldn’t have just moved out to a better place instead.

The second thing he notices is Jaehyun himself, when he finally gathers enough courage to look at  _ him _ instead of his surroundings. It’s the first time he’s seen him dressed so casually, in a loose t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants. His hair is down, just barely covering his eyes and Doyoung feels his stomach clench at how familiar the sight is. Jaehyun looks so much younger like this, reminding him of a young, struggling college student more than a successful lawyer.

The third thing Doyoung notices makes his breath catch in his throat and his heart threatens to stop beating. As Jaehyun gestures for Doyoung to come in, the collar of his t-shirt shifts slightly to reveal a necklace dangling around his neck. Doyoung freezes in place as he processes the shape of the two pendants hanging at the end of the centre of the chain.  _ Lock and key _ . It takes Jaehyun a moment to follow Doyoung’s line of sight to his neck, but the second he does, he’s hurriedly shoving the necklace back under his shirt.

This snaps Doyoung out of his reverie and he tries his best to erase the image out of his head even though he knows it’s too late and this new piece of information that Jaehyun still wears that necklace is going to keep him up for nights to come.

“Here,” he shoves the file towards Jaehyun, who takes it with a cautious look on his face before throwing it onto the side table without so much as a glance at it.

“Thank you,” he says and he’s looking directly at Doyoung now.

There’s a bit of a desperate look in his eyes that Doyoung can’t quite seem to decipher the meaning behind. He holds the eye contact for a beat longer before turning away to leave. He had completed what he came here to do, the file was delivered and now he could go home and try not to curse Ten out too much.

Before he can wrap his hand around the door handle, Jaehyun speaks up again.

“Have you eaten?” the question is rushed and Jaehyun is now looking down at his feet with a blush beginning the rise on his cheeks, “I just finished making dinner and I made some extra.”

Doyoung looks behind Jaehyun to see that the dining table has indeed been set up for a meal, some sort of pasta dish by the looks of it. His stomach grumbles at the thought of a home-cooked meal.

“I didn’t know you could cook,” he says instead of replying.

Back in college, the only thing Jaehyun knew how to make was instant ramen and even that was mediocre at best. To say that the two of them survived on cereal and takeout back then would be an understatement.

“I picked it up a few years back,” Jaehyun shrugs and then he’s looking back up at Doyoung again, this time with a hopeful look in his eyes, “So? It’s just dinner.”

“ _ Okay _ ,” he says quietly because he’s not strong enough to say no, not when he’s in their old apartment that still smells just like Jaehyun.

He’s tired and hungry and it wouldn’t kill him to give in once. After all, it was  _ just dinner _ .

Jaehyun seems caught off guard by Doyoung’s acceptance but still leaps into action to prepare another place setting at the table. Doyoung takes his time to walk over and sit down, trying his best at the same time to quell his instincts to run away. Jaehyun joins him at the other end of the table, a bottle of wine and two glasses in his hand.

Doyoung raises an eyebrow, it seems Jaehyun is full of surprises today. “I didn’t know you drank wine. If I remember correctly, you used to call it  _ rotten grape juice which only old and miserable people pretend to enjoy _ .”

He lets a slight smile slip as he recalls the memory and doesn’t miss the way Jaehyun’s lips appear to curve up slightly as well, “Well, maybe I’m old and miserable now.”

Doyoung hums as he picks up his glass and takes a liberal sip, “I guess that makes the two of us.”

Dinner goes surprisingly smoothly, the wine a crucial factor in easing both of their nerves. Jaehyun’s cooking is better than Doyoung had expected and he makes sure to let him know once he feels drunk enough to be comfortable to compliment him. He had forgotten how much he missed the sound of Jaehyun’s laugh, cheeks rosy from the alcohol as he threw his head back in giggles as Doyoung recounts a silly story about his touring days. It shouldn’t feel this natural to be around Jaehyun again but it does. It feels miles away from their first awkward evasive meeting months ago.  _ So much for trying to keep his distance. _ Yet with the wine in his system, as he leans into closer to Jaehyun as he starts to trash talk one of his past clients, Doyoung can’t find in him any desire to pull away. 

It’s surreal to see how much Jaehyun has changed over the years. He’s both very much the same person but entirely different at the same time. He’s more confident and sure of himself when he talks, a shadow of the nervous, bumbling mess Doyoung once knew.  _ He’s grown up _ , he realizes. In the time they’ve been apart, Jaehyun has somehow turned into a man and it suddenly unsettles him that he wasn’t there to witness that change.

“I should go…” he says quietly, later when they are sitting on the couch after Jaehyun is done clearing away the dishes.

Jaehyun doesn’t say anything, giving him a conflicted look so Doyoung doesn’t make a move to stand up just yet. His brain is feeling a little fuzzy from the wine now as he takes a second to properly take in Jaehyun before him. His eyes land on his necklace again, it’s revealed itself once again along with a good portion of his collarbone under the neckline of his loose t-shirt. Doyoung doesn’t even realize he’s reached out to touch the necklace until he feels Jaehyun suck in a deep breath under his fingertips. This time, Jaehyun doesn’t try to hide the necklace again, he stays still as he allows Doyoung to inspect each pendant, turning them over in his fingers to read the engravings on the back.

He looks up to see Jaehyun staring at him intensely, taken aback by how close they are now and Doyoung wonders if it’s possible that Jaehyun’s gotten even more beautiful in the last five years. It’s a deadly and selfish thought but he can’t help it as his eyes dart over the face that he used to spend hours trying to memorize. He drops the pendant but doesn’t drop his hand, instead, resting his fingers along the edge of Jaehyun’s exposed collarbone, tracing the smooth skin gently.

He shivers under the touch and Doyoung can feel Jaehyun’s hands twitching to reach out for him from where they rest by his sides. They ultimately stay in place even though something deep inside Doyoung is longing that they wouldn’t. 

He’s not all that sure what he’s doing right now and he’s more than aware that it’s likely not the best idea but he hasn’t been able to  _ touch _ Jaehyun in so many years and now all he wants is more. His sober self wouldn’t have allowed himself to even sit anything less than three feet away from Jaehyun but he’s not sober right now and any sort of distance between the two of them is looking more and more distasteful.

Doyoung drops his hand down from Jaehyun’s collarbone to rest on his thigh. Jaehyun stiffens at the sudden change in placement and Doyoung checks his face for any sign of discomfort. His eyes are darkened and he looks a little far off but nothing in his expression is betraying that he doesn’t want Doyoung here right now. If anything, his eyes almost look as if they are pleading him to do more and everything inside Doyoung itches to oblige. At this point, he’s completely tuned out the last rational part inside his brain warning him that this is a bad idea and this was the same boy who smashed his heart to bits five years ago. Another voice inside his head reminds him that this was also the same boy he loved for fifteen years.

It’s a split-second decision. One moment he’s sitting beside him rubbing soothing circles into Jaehyun’s thigh with his thumb and the next he’s slipped out the couch and found himself resting on his knees between Jaehyun’s legs. Jaehyun stares down at him with wide eyes at his new positioning, breathing heavily as Doyoung starts to trail his hands higher. He lets out an audible gasp when Doyoung cups his crotch over his sweatpants and begins to palm him gently. He looks more nervous than aroused and is barely even half-hard yet but Doyoung is determined and Jaehyun isn’t stopping him.

It’s interesting how fast muscle memory kicks in because Doyoung barely has to process it before Jaehyun pants are down by his ankles and as Doyoung carefully strokes his now rapidly hardening length. Jaehyun lets out a high pitched whine and that’s all the encouragement Doyoung needs to lean forward and wrap his lips around the head of his cock. He slowly teases the tip with his tongue before bracing himself to lower his mouth all the way and swallow him down whole. Jaehyun’s hands fly to tangle themselves into his hair and Doyoung moans around his cock, startling himself with the realization of how much he’s missed this feeling.

Even after all their time apart, Doyoung still hasn’t forgotten exactly how to unravel him and it doesn’t take long for Jaehyun to become a panting mess underneath him, shallowing thrusting his hips up into Doyoung’s mouth as he chases his release. He’s well aware of his own arousal in his pants but brushes it aside, that’s not important right now. It’s been so long since he’s been able to give someone else,  _ to give Jaehyun _ , pleasure like this and just that knowledge that he still holds this power over Jaehyun is enough to make his head spin and insides fill with warmth. He thinks he feels his heart skip a beat when Jaehyun finally spills into his mouth with a loud moan of his name.

It is only when he pulls off, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, that he realizes the gravity of the situation. Before he even has a chance to allow the panic to set in, he feels a hand grab a fistful of his shirt and pull him up until he’s sitting beside Jaehyun again. 

“Doyoung,” he breathes out and along with the lust, there’s a fondness in his eyes that Doyoung wasn’t anticipating.

Jaehyun eyes are on his lips now and Doyoung can’t help it when his own gaze falls to Jaehyun’s lips as well, cursing at how inviting they look, still red and bitten from when Jaehyun was probably biting down on them earlier to hold back his moans. He doesn’t register Jaehyun leaning until the very last second before their lips touch when his brain suddenly decides to wake up again and all of a sudden Doyoung is pulling away and standing up so quickly that he nearly falls over. 

“Sorry,” Doyoung says, shaking his head, “I have to go.”

He nearly runs to the doorway throws on his shoes before yanking the door open, all the while trying to pretend he doesn’t see the mix of shock and disappointment on Jaehyun’s face as he bolts out the door. He keeps going until he’s out of the apartment complex and halfway down the block where collapses onto the grass in a mess of gasps and tears as he tries to dial Taeyong’s number to come to pick him up. Now that he’s outside and the fresh air is working to sober up his mind, Doyoung isn’t sure what was the bigger mistake, agreeing to stay in the first place or pulling away when Jaehyun tried to kiss him. 

 

Doyoung wakes up the next morning to a throbbing headache and a text from Jaehyun.

**_-I just wanted you to know that I don’t regret last night and I hope you don’t either._ **

-

 

The case ends and it feels like Doyoung more or less disappears from the face of the earth. Not only does he not reply to Jaehyun’s texts, of which he’s sent plenty, but the last few times Jaehyun has dropped by the company to wrap things up Doyoung wasn’t even in his studio. When Jaehyun tries to ask Ten about where Doyoung is, he just gives him a hard look and tries to change the subject. 

It’s frustrating and it’s all Jaehyun can think about now. That night should have been progress, especially with the way it had started so well. For a little bit, Jaehyun had nearly fooled himself into believing they were still the same Jaehyun and Doyoung from five years ago, before everything fell apart. He’s forgotten how it felt to not constantly have that underlying ache of loneliness. 

It’s probably his own fault for pushing Doyoung so far, for not stopping him before he went crossed all the boundaries that neither of them would be able to go back on. He should have known Doyoung wasn’t in the right state of mind and tried harder,  _ or tried at all _ , to push him away. But Jaehyun is a weak man and goddamn did he want Doyoung, he wanted him with a burning, all-consuming need that preoccupied every inch of his body and if he were to do it all over again, he’s likely still would not have been able to resist. He only wishes he knew what was going on in Doyoung’s head. 

“Are you free Saturday night?” Ten asks him. 

It’s the last meeting and it’s more protocol and formalities than anything. After this, Jaehyun won’t have any more reason to come around anymore.

“Probably,” he answers, “Why?”

“Taeyong is organizing a little dinner to celebrate the end of the case. As his lawyer, I think it’s only fitting you attend.  _ All  _ of his friends will be there.”

The implication is clear and Jaehyun doesn’t even have to think as he agrees to Ten’s invitation with a simple  _ “Sure. _ ” 

Jaehyun’s not sure what he’s done to deserve all these chances but he sure as hell wasn’t going to complain when this could very well be his last chance to try and get back the only thing that’s ever mattered to him.

-

“You know you can’t hide out here forever right?”

Doyoung glares at Taeyong from where he’s cuddled up on his bed. “And why not?” he asks petulantly even though he’s already more than aware of the answer.

Taeyong sits down on the edge of the bed and yanks back the covers, eliciting a loud whine from Doyoung who scrambles, unsuccessfully, to pull the sheets back. 

“People are starting to notice you’re not at work. You’re lucky management thinks so highly of you and haven’t scolded you for slacking off yet, but keep this up and they’re are going to start asking questions.”

Doyoung groans and shoves his head further into Taeyong’s pillow.

“In fact, Ten told me that Jaehyun asked where you were the other day,” Taeyongs says cautiously, looking at him carefully to gauge his reaction, “I’ve seen the way you’ve been ignoring his messages and calls. You can’t avoid him forever.”

Doyoung can’t help but flinch slightly at the mention of Jaehyun’s name, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. The case is over, thus ending all our possible means of contact. As for work, I’ll go back once I feel better.”

Taeyong scoffs at him and Doyoung can tell by the way his face is scrunching up in frustration that he’s mad at him. He knows Taeyong comes from a place of love and usually Doyoung would feel bad about riling him up so much but he’s  _ going through something _ right now and can’t help it if he’s coming off as being a little difficult.

“How long are you going to drag this on for?” Taeyong asks, “So what you meet your ex again after five years? So what you  _ accidentally  _ sleep with him? This shit happens and it’s fine to upset about it for a while but you can’t let it get in the way of your entire life.”

“I didn’t actually sleep with him,” is all Doyoung mumbles in reply.

Taeyong gives him a pointed look, “Yeah whatever, you sucked him off,  _ same thing _ . It’s not going to do you any good to just sit around regretting it.”

Doyoung pouts, his insides feel as if they’re in knots. “That’s not the problem,” he says softly, looking down, “the problem is that I keep wishing I  _ had _ slept with him, that I had stayed instead of running away like a coward. I don’t know what’s wrong with me or why I feel like this but all I know is that I can’t risk running into him or else I’m going to end up doing something dumb.”

Taeyong crawls up the bed until he’s seated right beside Doyoung, his expression has softened significantly. He looks a bit taken aback by this sudden confession, not expecting this sort of reaction from him. It’s mostly own fault considering how little he’s actually shared with Taeyong about his thoughts on this whole mess, but it’s a little difficult to do so when he can barely wrap his head around his feelings.

“What do you mean by  _ something dumb _ ?”

Doyoung wants to pull his own hair out in frustration at himself. “I’m afraid that if I see him again,” his voice is starting to waver, “I won’t be able to hold back from saying something stupid like confessing that I’m still in love with him.”

Taeyong gives Doyoung long, contemplative look before speaking up again. “And are you still in love with him?” he asks, his voice sincere and not at all full of the judgement Doyoung had been afraid of.

He gives him a little shrug, partially because he’s not too sure of the answer himself.

Taeyong sighs, reaching out to gently comb his hands through Doyoung’s hair. “It’s not normal to be hung up on an ex for this long,” he starts and immediately receives a frown from Doyoung, “but you know what’s also not normal, for that same ex to also be still hung up on  _ you _ . And don’t argue with me on this, it’s obvious, you should see how sad he looks every time I tell him you aren’t going to take part in the meetings.”

“Where are you trying to go with this?”

“What I’m trying to say is that maybe this is a sign, maybe the world purposely had you guys reunite after seeing how miserable you were without each other.”

He’d be lying is he said he hadn’t considered what Taeyong is saying but it unnerves him to hear it out loud. Sometimes it felt like too much of a coincidence that Jaehyun had ended up as their lawyer, but Doyoung didn’t like to contemplate the concept of fate these days. Which is funny because if you had asked him five years ago about what he thought about soulmates, he would have insisted that Jaehyun was his. Although, he quickly buried that belief the second he walked out the door the day everything fell apart. 

Taeyong doesn’t seem surprised when Doyoung doesn’t reply. He gives Doyoung’s head one last pat before standing up. “Don’t overthink it, you’ll only psych yourself out more,” he advises and Doyoung manages a small nod.

“Now the whole reason I brought all of this up today is because I’m having a dinner tonight to celebrate the end of the case. You’re my best friend and I couldn’t have done it without you so I’d really appreciate if you’d show up.”

Doyoung knows about the dinner. Taeyong has been not so subtly talking about it for the past week but he didn’t think much of it until now. The idea of going out and socializing after shutting himself away for the past two weeks seems wholly unappealing. Then again, showing up was probably the least he could do after he had somehow made one of the worst experiences of Taeyong’s life about himself.

“Okay,” he agrees and the bright smile that automatically spreads across Taeyong’s face does make him feel a little better.

-

The thing about being seated right across from Doyoung is that Jaehyun can’t help but find himself sneaking glances at him throughout the evening. Doyoung, on the other hand, has spent the majority of the time with his eyes trained intensely on the plate in front of him, silently picking at his food and only joining the conversation when someone directly addresses. As unresponsive as Doyoung is, Jaehyun is still glad to be able to see him in person after Doyoung had more or less disappeared off the face of the earth after that night at his place. The continued ignorance stings but at the very least, he doesn’t look too angry or upset. Jaehyun figures he still has lots of time tonight to try and break down the shell Doyoung has built up. 

Ten introduces Jaehyun to Kun, and he finds him to be a very pleasant and agreeable man and not at all about he had imagined the husband of someone as overwhelming as Ten to be like. The two of them, and Johnny, who’s spent the entire night so far with an arm wrapped around Taeyong’s shoulder, do their best to make him feel included and if he doesn’t think too hard about it and ignores the awkward tension between him and Doyoung, it almost feels like a night out with old friends, an experience Jaehyun hasn’t had in a long while. He tries to forget the realization that they are all coupled up except for him and Doyoung.

Like Doyoung, Taeyong doesn’t say much either. He throws several nervous glances over at him and Jaehyun catches them exchanging hushed whispers with each other every once in a while. 

“ _ You didn’t tell me he’d be here, _ ” Jaehyun had overheard Doyoung hiss to Taeyong when he first arrived.

“ _ I didn’t think he’d accept Ten’s invitation _ ,” Taeyong tries to explain with a loud whisper, giving him a mildly guilty look.

After that, Jaehyun is quick to avert his gaze and block out the rest of the conversation. As curious as he is, he’s afraid it will only make him feel worse than he already does. 

Even with all the distractions, it’s hard for Jaehyun not to be hyper-aware of each of Doyoung’s actions. He has to bite his tongue from making a comment when he notices Doyoung has barely touched his food. When Doyoung suddenly stands up, chair scraping loudly on the floor, Jaehyun can’t stop his head from snapping up at him and he nearly stands up as well on instinct before he realizes and stops himself. He watches as Doyoung scrambles off towards the back door, mumbling something about getting some air. Jaehyun begins to worry about what must be going on in his head that is so bad that he can’t even stand being in the same room as him.

It is only after Doyoung is out of earshot that Taeyong speaks to him for the first time. It’s not at all what Jaehyun expects.

“I think you should go and try to talk to him,” he says calmly, “he’s got a lot going on in his mind and most of it has to do with you.”

Out of everyone, he would have thought Taeyong would be the one to discourage him from talking to Doyoung, so it feels odd to see him do the opposite, with a concerned and almost pleading look in his eyes. The rest of the table has quieted down, having noticed in the increased tension and awaiting Jaehyun’s next move. Although winning Doyoung over again has been his original goal since the beginning of the evening, Jaehyun suddenly feels anxious and unsure of himself.

“Are you sure?” he asks carefully, knowing that by following Doyoung, he also risks further damaging their preexisting mess of a relationship.

“Yeah,” he says quietly, “this is something he needs to talk out with you. As long as you don’t screw it up.”

Jaehyun gulps but nods, slowly rising from his chair and following in the direction Doyoung had gone. He knows he won’t get another opportunity to get Doyoung alone like this.

He exits through the back door and finds Doyoung leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets. Jaehyun approaches him cautiously and joins him in leaning on the wall, making sure to leave a few feet of space between them. Other than the sharp breath of air he lets slip out as Jaehyun settles next to him, Doyoung barely reacts to his presence. They stand together in tense silence for a while, Jaehyun half-wondering when Doyoung would properly realize where he is and try to run away.

While Jaehyun is busy trying to gather enough courage to say something, Doyoung decides to beats him and speak up first, catching him off guard.

“You know,” Doyoung starts, sounding far calmer than Jaehyun felt, “We never actually broke up.”

Jaehyun pushes off the wall to look over at Doyoung in confusion. His eyes are closed and his face is expressionless. Jaehyun’s mind struggles to make sense of the words.

Doyoung continues, “You said it would only be a break and that you’d call me. Which you never did. But we never actually officially said it was over.”

He opens his eyes but continues to stare ahead. All Jaehyun can do is gape at him.

“I’m not sure how to respond to that.”

Doyoung sighs and gives a half-hearted shrug, “me neither, forget I said anything.”

By now his mask has started to slip and his expression morphs into something that looks mostly like exhaustion. Jaehyun’s mind begins to slip into the worst-case scenario, “Wait, did you want to make it official? Is that why you brought it up?”

Doyoung flinches slightly at Jaehyun’s panicked tone. “No,” he shakes his head, “it doesn’t matter now, either way, I’ll still be miserable.”

The tiredness and sincerity in his voice pains Jaehyun to hear and throws his entire self off-balance.

“I’m sorry, not calling you back was the worst choice I ever made. If it makes you feel any better, I’m miserable too.”

He sees the corners of Doyoung’s mouth turn down further.

“I have been for the last five years,” he clarifies as if it wasn’t already clear, “the other night when you came over was the happiest I’ve felt in ages.”

Jaehyun braces himself for rejection, for Doyoung to call him stupid or say that he regretted that night. He holds his breath when Doyoung finally turns to face him, his gaze burning a hole into his head. He swallows and stays still as Doyoung slowly inches closer, walking right up to him. The proximity has his eyes flickering down to Doyoung’s lips and now all he can think about is leaning in and kissing those lips he’s craved to feel against his again for so long. It takes everything in him to hold back and restrain himself, he doesn’t want to scare Doyoung off again, but none of that ends up mattering because Doyoung gives in first, closing the gap as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

Kissing Doyoung again is like finally being able to breathe after feeling as if his entire body has been slowly drowning since the day he walked out the door. Something about it just feels fundamentally  _ right _ and the only other experience he can equate this feeling to is the very first time Doyoung kissed him. He can’t put into words the instant relief that floods into his body to have something you’ve wanted and craved for so long but never believed you could actually have.

Doyoung pulls away far too soon, awkwardly stepping back and looking down in an attempt to hide his face. His cheeks are flushed red and he’s fidgeting in place. Jaehyun fights to urge to grab Doyoung by the collar and pull them back together again. His heart hammers so loudly in his chest that he can barely hear himself think. 

“Why’d you do that?” he asks breathless and in awe.

Doyoung bites his lip and looks as if he’s struggling to come up with an answer. 

“It’s to make up for running away last time.”

He lifts his head again and blinks at Jaehyun a few times, nervously anticipating his reaction.

“You don’t know how much I’ve missed you,” Jaehyun spills out quickly, coughing in order to hide the way his voice breaks at the end.

“Jaehyun,” Doyoung tries to argue but his voice doesn’t sound like it’s in any better condition than Jaehyun’s, “We aren’t the same people we were as kids. Everything is so different now.”

Jaehyun adamantly shakes his head, “I don’t know about you but I think you’re still exactly the same person I fell in love with when I was six. The same person I’m still in love with by the way.”

While it was true that he changed and matured in many ways, at his core, he was still the same Doyoung and there was nobody in the entire universe who could ever compare. Doyoung gives him a sad smile but stays quiet. 

“I don’t want to live without you anymore,” Jaehyun admits, finally feeling brave enough to say what he’s been wanting to see since the first day he walked into the room and saw Doyoung sitting there.

Jaehyun isn’t sure he’d survive letting Doyoung slip through his fingers a second time. 

“Me too,” Doyoung whispers after a long silence, so quietly that Jaehyun almost doesn’t hear it.

“But,” he continues and Jaehyun stiffens, “I don’t know if I can learn how to trust you again. I need time.”

However, his tone isn’t cold and there is a glimpse of a hopeful spark his eyes. It’s not much but it’s more than Jaehyun could have ever asked for. It feels like he has something to live for again.

“We’ll take it slow,” Jaehyun agrees, reaching out to grab one of Doyoung’s hands, “I once promised you forever and even though I messed up along the way, I still intend to keep that promise.”

Doyoung’s hand flinches slightly as if it wants to pull away. Jaehyun laces their fingers together until he feels him slowly begin to relax. Doyoung even gives his hand a little squeeze. This time Jaehyun wasn’t going to let go.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I can't believe it's over. Thank you to everyone who has made it this far, I'm a little sad to leave these two behind. Eeep, let me know what you think.
> 
>  
> 
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